


Oblivion

by lightline



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: mention of drugs, rather short and a bit of a ramble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-14 00:47:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2171562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightline/pseuds/lightline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As with the fear that Kieren speaks of at the dinner table, Simon Monroe finds that there are different types of oblivion that mark his dusks and dawns.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oblivion

As with the fear that Kieren speaks of at the dinner table, Simon Monroe finds that there are different types of oblivion that mark his dusks and dawns. Granted, they bring him peace and they bring him fear. They perplex him and confuse him at time. But what he knows for sure is that they are constant in his life, marking the end and the beginning with two distinct chapter marks. He often wonders if this is perhaps his addiction, his hold on everything. 

1\. The state of being unaware or unconscious of what is happening around one:

There is the oblivion that walked hand in hand with the pills, the injections and the powder. Though back then, he found it to be a numbing oblivion, one that wrote him off from the world of living even before his heart stopped beating. This was an oblivion that sent him to a place where pain was merely a concept, where the troubles and worries of life were insignificant in the grand scheme of his life. Where his nerve endings were blunted and his thoughts and commitments were locked into the back of his mind. That gave him saviour from the uneasiness in his stomach, the pain that rang through his mind. The everlasting notion that everything, from the light teal’s and purples that streaked the sky to the notes that sang from a guitar, was pointless. But this oblivion didn’t last too long, and for that he is glad. 

2\. Destruction or extinction:

In the arms of the ULA, of the Undead Prophet and his fellow disciples, he cultivates a fear of oblivion. A fear of the end for the Redeemed, for those who were chosen to rise from the earth and walk another day in an new image of perfection. It is a rational fear, of course, knowing what the monsters in Norfolk are capable of, how the social stigma against the different cultivating fear against those who had no choice. Who did not chose to enter this new dawn and were instead thrust into it.

It is only upon reflecting that he sees this era of oblivion with regret. That he views it as a time of stumbling blindly after a cause he found by accident with a bottle of drugs rammed in his pocket to a voice he does not know the owner of. That he was merely a pawn in the works, just as he had been in the Treatment Centre, as he had been to the drug dealers of his old life. However, he realises that perhaps this was necessary, necessary to meet the two Roarton Risers who he would never forget.

3\. The state of being forgotten, especially by the public:

Eventually, he finds he does not mind being forgotten when it offers saviour. Instead he craves it, seeks it out if possible. To be stricken from the list known to all who follow the clenched fist of the ULA, to be forgotten by those who used to hang on his every word in the bungalow, in the commune. Receive blank stares instead of hisses of traitor, find his home undisturbed instead of bible quotes being plastered on every available surface. 

This form of oblivion, he realises when he’s been allowed a break from the nightmares that haunt his mind, i it offers freedom, offers some sort of future with the bronze-haired boy he calls beautiful in the dead of night, who he watches with reverence and loyalty despite some typically sarcastic comments being made in return. Who he gave up everything for, who he would risk everything for again at the drop of a hat. 

Sometimes, he toys with the idea that this was the oblivion he was always looking for, though one he had never had the chance to experience in his previous years walking the planet that has given the risen such life. Perhaps it was life testing him, trying him, letting him find his peace eventually.


End file.
